Areas of Unrest

QOTD: "A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject." - Winston Churchill

Reading: Tim Moore, Frost on My Moustache

Listening to: nothing

Decluttering accomplishments: massive amounts of household paperwork and also managed to slightly reduce the resemblance of my apartment to a yarn shop, though that only increases the resemblance to a bookstore

2 March 2003 - I Planned To Be Interesting

I had a whole bunch of odds and ends to write about that were going to be oh so intriguing. For example, I was going to use the excuse of having sent off my visa applications this week to discourse on the subject of visa applications, in general. Those who limit their travels to more normal destinations may never have the dubious pleasure of wondering if anybody ever answers yes to questions like "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" In getting this set of photos (one each for Armenia and Georgia, two for Azerbaijan), I forgot myself and smiled. Fortunately, none of these applications were like the one I once had to fill out which stipulated that the applicant for a visa must submit photos with a "serious expression." (I can't recall whether that was India or Mongolia.) I also got to stand in line at the post office to express mail the forms and a way too sizable check to the travel agency for long enough that I could read all of the "what you can and can't mail" poster. But now I've forgotten whether you can mail queen bees and can't mail scorpions or if it's the other way around. And I think you can send ladybugs only by surface mail and not air mail, which sounds rather backwards.

And I was going to have my taxes finished so I could discourse amusingly about what century Virginia's tax forms were written in, given their numerous exclusions for fisherman and farmers and merchant seamen. I've been told that the Virginia tax laws are nearly unchanged since the days of Thomas Jefferson. On the plus side, they are not quite as annoying as the California tax forms that require you to identify how many days you spent in the state on business and vacation before or after your period of residence. It is alleged that nobody has ever filled out a California partial year tax return correctly and I fear that I am not destined to be the first. I will give it my best try. But I'm not even done with the federal return yet and that's the easiest of the three, my only excuse being simple procrastination.

I did drop off some needlework to be finished. Admittedly, two of the four pieces were a pair of crewel embroideries reading "Love" and "Peace." That should be enough to date them to around 1972. They're amongst the first three or four pieces of needlework I ever did and turned up in Mom's closet some time ago. In four to six weeks, they'll be nicely set into a pillow, which I don't have any room to display either. The other two pieces are the needlepoint flower pictures I bought in Bermuda. The woman at the shop looked at them and exclaimed, "you do basketweave!" I could only stare blankly and ask, "doesn't everyone?" (They look the same from the front, but half-cross stitch distorts the canvas far more than basketweave does. And basketweave is far stronger. I taught myself basketweave in about 23 seconds when i was 16 years old. It's hardly an esoteric skill.)

So, anyway, I do realize this page has been most dull of late and I really did intend to come up with amusing anecdotes along the lines of what a visa form for the Commonwealth of Virginia would look like. Or at least to list some of my ideas for adult education classes for the modern era (the wild animal weight loss encounter!) or to tell you about the brilliant title I came up with for my half hour at the Washington Folk Festival ("Fools, Fortunes and Fowl" because everything is funnier when you add a chicken and i really do have a story that has two chickens in it, though they're not quite in it since they're just being cooked and eaten but one of the other stories has a rooster). But I've had to forgo being interesting because I got into this fit of domestic activity (crocheting! knitting! cooking! laundry! scrubbing the toilet! Can't you just feel the excitement?) and I have to pack to go on a business trip.

I do promise to try to find time to say something more profound soon.